God, G-d, Father, Mother, Yahweh, Allah, Whatever

I have hesitated on writing about God (or my version of God) because... well, what if I got it wrong? What if God really was/is one of us? Just a stranger on a bus? What if Joan Armstrong was right? Or what if I was right? Plus, what if I would be ridiculed by atheists everywhere? I really do care what everyone thinks. I have a no discrimination policy regarding my insecurities.

The thing is, I'm not sure what I believe. God and I have had a tenuous (SAT word!) relationship at best. The reality is that most of the time I call God a he and that irks me. God is not a maternal figure for me, even though I do recognize the maternal characteristics of God. And I know, I know that God is not male or female or human for that matter, but God is still this Father Time, old man, skinny Santa Clause image in my mind. The Holy Spirit image for me is much more soothing, maybe because of the confusing nature of what exactly the Holy Spirit is (or is imagined to be) - nebulous air? wind? breath? whatever?

I like the God of the Old Testament not because I like everything God does in the Old Testament - I mean, really, God does a lot of shitty things in the Old Testament and just comes off as a mean tempered, violent and without reason. The God of the New Testament reminds me of a Bill Cosby joke about why grandparents are so much nicer to their grandchildren than their children- they are just old people trying to get into heaven now. SO, the reason I like the God of the OT is because he is fallible. Yes! God makes mistakes! Some will disagree with me on this point, but that's ok. God loses his temper and throws fits and makes poor Job suffer for apparently no reason. He comes up with plenty of excuses for doing the things he does but still God could be a lot nicer - and he isn't.

God does not make a very strong impression in the New Testament as Jesus seems to become the main character there. So who is this God we all profess to believe in as Christians? Just the father of Jesus, the main character? Or is God more than that?

I think Joan Armstrong is right and wrong... God is the stranger on the bus, and me and you and the air in between. God created all and is all. Can God evolve? Yes. Can God grow? Yes. Can God change? Yes. Is God within, without and beyond? Absolutely.

Who is God? I don't know but I'll let you know if I ever find him/her/me/us.

Note: I am not writing a review on the second book that I read of my summer reading list, "The Changing Face of God". It is a compilation of essays on God and it is good, light reading, good for reflection and an introduction to several, more liberal theologians' views on God. If anyone is interested in it, I'll ship the book to you for free via media mail. Just email me your address to justbecause81 (at) gmail (dot) com.