Book Review: Contemplative Prayer by Thomas Merton

Thomas Merton was a Trappist monk of the Abbey of our Lady of Gethsemani in Kentucky. He was a prolific writer, who wrote about spirituality and was interested in inter-religious dialogue. I picked up this book because of my constant pursuit of the perfect way to pray.

Merton begins the book stating clearly that this book is intended for monks. He does not deny that this book can be useful for laity but the intended audience of the book are people in religious orders. Merton comes across as a bit crotchety in this book as if he were scolding all of us and our intentions when we pray. He states that there is no method or system for prayer - it is an attitude or outlook. He says "Meditation has no point and no reality unless it is firmly rooted in life." (p.59) He also differentiates between private and public prayer though he says that both can feed into each other.

Part of my interest in reading what monks and nuns think about prayer is the idea that they have these organized lives organized devotion to God and organized prayer times and the idea that all of these things require a separation from the world or the "worldly". But Merton says that prayer should not take us out the world but more firmly root us in it - it should connect us more to those around us and make us more aware.

Prayer does not blind us to the world, but it transforms our vision of the world, and makes us see it, all men, and all the history of mankind, in the light of God.

I enjoyed this book, particularly a mention at the end on the danger of religion when let it be superficial and dependent on political ideals. Merton describes very well back in the 1960s what is occurring today with the current administration.

Some of the chapters are boring as Merton goes through some prayer history in terms of the Benedictine tradition of prayer. However, this book is very accessible. This is not a systematic how to pray book but Merton has some very clear ideas of what constitutes sincere prayer. It also seems to be a very honest book of Merton's personality. I think I would have enjoyed getting to know him, scolding and all.

Praying differently?

I have always been fascinated with monasticism and prayer. As I have mentioned before, I once had a childhood fantasy of becoming a nun. I'm pretty sure the appeal is in the solitude and organized aspect of that kind of life. While for some that kind of regulation seems boring, for me it feels productive. If I could organize my life that way with the support of a community, I might get more accomplished. These days I have nothing much going on except entertaining a 16 month old who is oh, so close to walking. You'd think I'd get more done.

Anyway, back to nuns and monks. Even celibacy appeals, even now. With my firm belief that celibacy is not a choice but a gift, I wish I had that gift. To be able to channel all my sexual energy and all my real energy towards community living, social justice and loving the world as opposed to loving one person is one of the things I'll never have. However, I can only hope that I will find someone who will love me - and Tomas - and who I - and Tomas - will love, and that our relationship will enhance and better us so that we can do our part towards community living, social justice and world peace. Oh, and a second kid. (I really, really want a girl!! I keep thinking of putting Tomas in a dress, taking a picture and pulling it out whenever the girl longing pains my heart.)

But because I can't become a nun, and the world does not function in the measured time of a monastery, how can I live my day so that I take time out to center myself, ground myself enough so that I don't become paralyzed and lost in my anxieties and depression? I have thought of creating my own hours with my own music and my own prayers mixed with some of my favorite psalms and readings. This might take me a while, but I realized that as my seminary days grow more and more distant, the less I read that inspires me and that motivates me. My passion for social justice has declined because I am no longer around people who are motivated by those things. Not that the people I hang out with aren't motivated by legitimate things. Family worries and busyness is legitimate. I just wanted more for myself and I have let my seminary failure determine my life and that needs to stop. I need to find the old part of myself that I loved and update her to what my life is now. As I evolve, as God-lover, trendy non-granola semi-hippie and mom, as I figure out what it is that I really want and need (immediately, a shower - in the future, TBD), I will find an end to the run-on sentence that is my life and find some satisfaction and fulfillment even if I'm not happy all the time.

Slight rant

I asked God to spare me pain.
God said, No.
Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me.

I take issues with this statement. Many, many issues. But I’ll name just one.

This is the kind of statement that rich people can use as an excuse to say, “Well, it’s a good thing that the poor suffer because it brings them closer to God.” Okay, maybe two issues.

TWO: Suffering alone does not bring us closer to God. I do think that God is in suffering. Just because things are bad does not mean that God is excluded from it. Just like when things are good does not mean that God is there. HOWEVER, suffering does not equal good experience. Cross bearing SUCKS. It is meant to suck. It is not alleviated by the thought, “At least this will bring me closer to God.” Pain was not created to bring us closer to God. I am not in the God killed Jesus camp. Jesus did not die for my sins – he died because of them. Jesus would not have suffered had it not been for human crappiness – I can’t believe that is a word. Suffering is NOT a badge of honor. Suffering is BAD and should be eliminated. Will it be? No. That is not the point. The point is that statements like the one above make suffering seem like something holy and spiritual because it will “bring[s] [us] closer to [God].”

I think I’ll pass.